The phrase "dog standing on its hind legs" springs to mind.
Congenital cretins swimming in circles, legless morons playing basketball (incidentally the worst game in the world next to shove ha'penny), blind cyclists, retarded lunatics doing weightlifting, women with springs stuck up their fannies running the 100 metres. The sailing - Jesus Christ! Yo ho ho and a bottle of largactyl!
Now, I've nothing against disabled people, but I'd like to think that if I lost noth my legs in some horrible accident, I wouldn't expect the world to watch my rehabilitation.
Usain Bolt - 9.whatever. Me - 15.forever.
I agree sharkman.Did you see the British guy who's won something beating his chest like a gorilla? Fantastic. Or the girl who'd just managed to swim 100 metres in around four minutes drooling and crying? Enlightening. The commentators are the best. They are all trying so hard no to be patronising that they just sound ludicrous. Here's a REAL example from last night from the wheelchair basketball.
"And, yes, Philips has taken a real battering there. Yes, yes, he's fallen out of his chair - oh, this is tragic. Somebody help him, please, quick!"
Fucking fantastic! Disabled athletics is a bit like me going on TV ot explain the point of the Hadron Collider - "Yes, and now the protons are zipping along, and yes, yes! They've hit some more. E MC squared, Led Zeppelin, Houston we have a problem, oh - we'll do it live, fuck it!" I mean - why would a disabled person want to do anything sporty? Just be fucking disabled and get on with claiming your benefits. Get people to cook your food and open doors for you. Be cute, make funny noises and do foot painting. But for fuck's sake, don't expect me to pay a TV licence to watch you wheeling yourselves around in shiny vests.
Well..............for a long time I have admired your posts. Selfdeprecating, sometimes brilliant, sometimes earthy and on point, and other times simply entertaining.
This last one leaves me amazed...how could I have seen you as admirable - I mean, this one is totally without redeeming graces.
You condemn the disadvantaged to some sort of remote realm where they should mire themselves in their deficient existence while keeping from annoying you by their aspirations to achieve, and maybe improve, but at least to test the extremes of their abilities as limited as they may be.
Irony? I have a face like an arse, therefore I do not enter beauty contests. My cousin has only one leg, and he can see no point in trying to run fast. Instead, he writes very amusing articles for a well-known magazine.
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