glumbert

first comment again?

fuck you asshole

Obesity makes me vomit.

Drinking too much makes me vomit

Looking at vomit makes me vomit

Looking at vomit makes me want to drink.

Sir, you are suspected to carry a concealed meal!

drinking too much vomit makes me vomit

Talking about...Wait, be back

folds of human watsed foods.

That's just kinda mean.


I did giggle a little tho..... am I bad?

i'm strange that's what my mother says.

This isn't funny. In fact it's bullying caught on camera. Hope he can deal with his wife leaving him for a man a bit bigger, but without an evil nature.

What did the guy do in the first place?

...and after all that he only had a faulty indicator light.

Still the chubby man was much more nimble than I thought he'd be when asked to kick the door shut

Personally I'd have called the K-9 unit and got them to chase him up and down the street for 20 mins or so and then let him off with a warning to lay off the lard and get down to the local gym 5 times a week for the next month

Or maybe I'd have just shot him

I'm torn betwixt evil and...well...more evil I guess

Fat bastard!

He was laughing at him for pulling up his shirt so high he couldn't see. He was a rolly turd too so he was not laughing at him for being a fat blob. Being obese in America this is so common its not even looked at as weird anymore. Sad. No wonder the rest of the world is laughing at us.

Well you all talked about shooting him, how the hell could you miss?
Try shooting Olive Oil, now that's a tuff shot.

People laughing at overweight citizens is understandable.
However, when we meet our maker, lying in the ward spitting phlegm into a kidney-shaped stainless steel bowl, grasping the oxygen mask, with numerous plastic tubes affixed to our ravaged forms, not recognising our children and spouses, in a morphine-induced half world, trying to eat the bed sheets, seeing dark shapes flitting across the ceiling, having occasional moments of clarity when our guilt at living a largely misspent life overwhelms us with unspeakable grief, listening to vague sounds which might be nurses patronizing us, wishing it were all over, but at the same time clinging on to life because that is what we are programed to do, eventually losing a major part of our intestines in one last heaving moment, hearing someone say "Jesus, what a smell, I didn't think that was possible", wishing we had perhaps found a God of our understanding, and then slipping into the hands of the truth sent from above, laughing at fat people may not seem all that smart.

If you find the above depressing, let's hear a witty riposte.
Come on Glumbert posters - let's hear something funny now. Use you aliases, your cowardly jibes and puerile catchphrases. Let's hear the trivia at which you excel. Come on - let's hear it!

Tremendously witty.

Have you ever watched someone die?

To speak of death, as in living, it's best to lie about both.

Hanging Breasts

Hanging there like beautiful breasts,
hanging there all breast like,
waiting for you like a taxi
Staring at you without shame
i want to can this moment
the touch a moment away
rocking to and throw like breasts do
Breasts, big beautiful breasts
asking you so many questions
did you put the rubbish out
have you paid that bill
yes yes i have

skidmarks - you are an illiterate buffoon.
However, you appear to have some insight.
Keep trying, and the others may follow.

A few minutes before the church services started,
the congregation was
sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan
appeared at the front of
the church. Everyone started screaming and running
for the back entrance,
trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away
from evil incarnate.

Soon the church was empty except for one elderly
gentleman who sat calmly in
his pew without moving, seemingly oblivious to the
fact that God's ultimate
enemy was in his presence. So Satan walked up to the
man and said,

'Do you know who I am?'

The man replied, 'Yep, sure do.'
'Aren't you afraid of me?' Satan asked.

'Nope, sure ain't.' said the man.

'Don't you realize I can kill you with one word?'
asked Satan.

'Don't doubt it for a minute,' returned the old man,
in an even tone.

'Did you know that I can cause you profound,
horrifying AGONY for all
eternity?' persisted Satan.
'Yep,' was the calm reply.

'And you're still not afraid?' asked Satan.
'Nope,' said the old man.

More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, 'Why
aren't you afraid of me?'

The man calmly replied, 'Been married to your sister
for 48 years.

As excellent as one would expect.
I come here not to preach. I am here for my entertainment, as you are, stupid skidmarks person. It is just that your contributions to the general entertainment are less than amusing.

Sorry Mako. I'm pinnochio and just got bored, so I thought I'd insult somebody. But skidmarks is not and never has been funny.